//------------------------------// // Tomato and Mint's Tales // Story: Capriccio - A Detective Story // by Visharo //------------------------------// Major Tomato, veteran and socialite, sat on a couch nursing a terrible wound on his head. Mint, wife and caretaker, sat next to her husband holding the ice pack against his head. Both watched Roof Thatcher enter and then leave. Pizza Margherita was called in and left as well. That newspaper lackey entered as well and left unharmed. The three of them wore a grin, a frown, and a thought provoking expression respectively. By now, Major Tom was sure of his safety. As for Mint, she wasn't sure what was going to happen at all and was dreading their names. As if by fate, Detective Octavia Melody called out their names. Together. With nothing else to do, the two rose together and marched to the dining hall. He entered with calm confidence whilst she entered with slight hesitation. "Major Tom. Mint. You may relax, all we want from you are your stories. Is that okay?" Detective Melody sat to the left of the table with a serious expression. At the head of the table was Detective Scratch, her expression unreadable beneath those purple shades and headphones. "Is she listening?" Mint just had to ask. All she got in return was a pointed look in her direction by the detective in question. "Our stories? Why, that's easy! I'm..." Tom stopped from an impatient waving motion from Detective Scratch. He looked on, confused. "She wants you to start at the moment you arrived at the Thatcher's residence. And she always wants to hear from both of you." The gray mare gazed at Mint as she shrunk against her husband. "Alright..." ooOOoo Major Tom and Mint and Fill arrived... ooOOoo He had to stop again by some more frantic waving. "Yes?" He was getting impatient. "Vinyl wants to know who Fill is. Nopony has mentioned him." Detective Melody translated. "Oh, well, Fish Fillet, although everypony calls him Fill for short. He's this short stallion, his most discernible feature, I suppose, is his bushy brown mustache. That and his Caneighdian accent." "He has a green coat and a brown mane and tail. I've never seen his cutie mark, so I dunno." Mint added. "Alright. Continue." ooOOoo So, Tom, Mint, and Fill arrived at the house. They opened the door without any trouble and was greeted by Thatcher. He pulled Tom aside and claimed that they needed to go get brandy. He also told Mint to go help out with Margherita. Fill was completely ignored but he wore an easy smile and trotted out of the room. Tom and Thatcher drank the night away, and everything became a blur. He has a terrible tolerance and memory becomes an issue after several drinks and he had many. As for Mint, she trotted over to where Margherita was struggling in the kitchen. She flashed a tired smile to Mint as she took her place beside the other mare. Together they started cooking dishes together like they've done it so many times and they have done it so many times. Everything was second nature, they were even passing ingredients and supplies to each other without talking. That's how long they've been cooking together. "Mint dear, everything alright in that household of yours?" "Yep! Tom is such a sweetheart and I have good friends who keep me company when I need some time by myself." She grinned a bit too widely. "I see." They kept at it and before long, Archduke's family arrived. The stallions went along with Tom and Thatcher while Archduchess came over to the other mares to help with cooking. The three of them exchanged pleasantries and finished up the small touches to the dishes Mint and Margherita had whipped up. He remembered that he was on fire and sinking in lava while Thatcher screamed his name and said something about avenging him. Then after several minutes of that, the four of them had a brilliant idea, although, he couldn't remember what the idea was. Before he knew it, he had crashed through the doors with the other stallions. The three mares in the kitchen looked up and saw their stallions on their backs and babbling. Then they started singing, some shanty about a mare pirate captain who ripped out ponies innards and hung them up as decoration for her boat. The four disappeared off into another hallway. "Alright, dearies. I say we have some fun, what say you? If I know my husband, and I pretty sure I do, then he'll be having them drinking his favourite brandy. The four of them won't be able to remember anything." Margherita said with a glint in her eye. The thought had Mint excited. The three chased after their stallions with deeds planned. Mint chased Tom down the hallway with a feral grin. So many thoughts were running through her head. When the couple rounded a corner, Mint pushed harder and crash on top of Tom, sending them both to the ground. "Honeeeeey!" She cackled gleefully. She got up and heaved with all her might and dragged the poor stallion out the back door and into the wilderness. She... ooOOoo "Do I have to say what I did?" Mint was blushing furiously. "I really don't want to say what I did." Detective Melody looked at the white unicorn who shrugged with a nod and a wave. Somehow that made sense to the gray mare as she turned back and said, "if you didn't meet anypony or hear anything suspicious, then no. You don't have to describe what you did." "Oh, thank Faust. No, I didn't hear or see anything suspicious." ooOOoo She trotted back to the house with a silly grin, leaving her husband behind. When she knocked, Margherita opened the door looking confused and all she got in answer was a giggle. She trotted ahead, got herself a drink, and started chatting with Poof. Charming colt. As for Tom, he found his way to the backyard of the house. He was sober, somehow. The hungover was terrible though, at least that was the same. He made his way to the backdoor relatively unharmed and stumbled inside. When he popped back up, he stumbled into Lord Branded. Thoughts ran through his head at a thousand miles an hour and before he realized what he was doing, he had an unconscious Lord Branded by his hooves. "Oh shoot!" He glanced around, wondering if anypony saw him. After checking for the third time, he decided to dispose the body outside. With the strength he found himself with, he managed to drag the poor stallion out into the grass outside and tried for the final push when suddenly... "Oh, hey there Tom!" The stallion in question uncharacteristically shrieked and warbled a bit, found a tarp off to the side and draped it over the body. "Oh, hey Fiiill!" Tom tried his best at acting casual. "Oh, you saw that sushi tower Margherita whipped up?" "Oh yeah, it was crazy." "All those raw foods, you gotta be careful. You might get sick." "Yeah yeah, not good for the health..." "You know, I couldn't help but notice that you've got a stallion knocked unconscious there Tom." The two ponies stared at each other. "You saw that, huh." "Oh yeah, sure did. Uh huh." "Well, there's a perfectly good reasonable explanation for that." "Oh, is it because you're holding him for ransom to help make payments on the deluxe carriage you bought earlier last month, Tom?" Fill smiled enthusiastically. "...yes, that's exactly it. That's surprisingly specific." Tom's hangover was gone now, this...crazh stallion, woke him up. "Well, I saw the carriage parked up there and I know what you do for a job (lack of one)," Fill coughed the last three words out without breaking stride, "and I put the two and two together." He chuckled with a bit of strain. "Alright, let's see what we've got here." Tom barely had anytime to protest before Fill whipped the tarp off revealing the still unconscious Branded. "Oh woow, you've conked him good here, Tom. Yeaah. Oh? Is that Lord Branded from CrystalInc.?" "Yeah, yeah it is." Tom was not feeling good. "His partner is not gonna like this, don'tcha know." He laughed again. "So yeah, what do we do now?" Tom rubbed his hooves together like a foal who got caught trying to take cookies. "Well, I suppose I should call Thatcher." "No! No no no, don't do that! Let's talk about this. What if I were to cut you in?" Tom made some gestures as if that would help. "Ah, gee, that's awfully generous of you, Tom, but I don't know..." Branded lifted his head slightly and mumbled incoherently. Fill yelled like a banshee and kicked the poor stallion over the head. The Lord fell back down unconscious. "Fill, what'd you do that for!" "Oh, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to! He just scared the living heckfire out of me!" Tom crouched over to look at the point of contact. "Ooh, you got him good." "Oh no, did I? Ah gee, well I'm so sorry." "Well, don't apologise to me!" "You know, ah, I'm just gonna go call Thatcher. You can't be doing stuff like this, Tom." Fill backed off slightly, wagging a hoof at him. "Now hang on! you're the one who hit him over the head with your hoof." "Well yeah, but I didn't..." Fill was cut off again by Branded moaning and lifting his head. He again kicked him on the head, forcing the stallion down under again. "Why do you keep doing that!!!" Tom asked with a high pitched voice, utterly baffled by what was happening. "I'm sooorry! I was just afraid that if he saw my face that he might think I was an accessory or something." "Well, you kind of are now!" Tom started prancing in place, panic blossoming over his face. "Ohhh, I should have never have done this! Just help me get him to a toilet before he gets hurt anymore." "Yeah yeah, okay okay." The two stallions were poised to heave the Lord onto their backs when suddenly. "Major Tom, your wife is wondering where you are." Van Dime trotted up with an air of professionalism while Tom badly covered up the body behind him. Fill crouched and launched upwards and kicked the poor butler on the head, leaving the poor colt on the ground unconscious as well. "FIIIILL, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" "He saw too much! He was going to rat on us!" "Rat on who!? Who are you!?" Tom waved his hooves around utter despair on his face. "Well, who is he!" "He's the butler of the Thatcher's, I thought you knew this!" "Ahhh, okay. Well, I should get going. I just, uhm..." The door opened again and this time it was the newspaper writer looking confused. "Wha...?" Fill wasted no time and threw a rock straight at the stallion's head. He dropped, unconscious before he even hit the ground. "WHYYYYYY!?" "He was asking too many questions!" "Are you insane!? He's just a newspaper writer!" "Aw, shoot, darn it all! You know, we could maybe get some gauze and clean this and..." The door opened up again revealing Tom's wife. "Oh Tom, there you are." Fill grabbed a piece of firewood and chucked it straight at Mint. She fell unconscious too. "FILL!" He ran over to check on his wife, she seemed alright. "These ponies can't take anymore head trauma!" "I'M SORRY! It just comes over me! And why do you have the busiest backyard in the history of kidnapping?" "Ah, just go!" Tom cried out, anguished. "Okay. Night, Tom!" "Good night!" Tom watched as the stallion ambled away before turning around a sighing, wondering what he should do now. He attempted to pick up his wife when suddenly. "You know, I just have to take care of one more thing." Fill's voice filled the air before something heavy slammed into Tom's head. Dirt and shards collapsed around the stallion. "OOOOOOW! WHY COULDN'T YOU HAVE USED YOUR HOOF!" "GEE! You got quite the skull there, Tom." He chuckled. "Yeah, you know we should just..." Another flowerpot slammed into Tom's head and before he knew it, he was out. *** The two awoke nearly at the same time. They both ignored the butler who was still on the ground and made their way to the living room, stumbling and keeping each other upright. It took a while, but they made it. They bypassed some of the other nobles and collapsed onto a couch, grabbing some hors d'oeuvres and relaxing. "Honey." "Yes, Mint?" "What was that." "I honestly have no idea." Then lightning cracked overhead and the world went dark. Thatcher calmed the crowd down saying it was perfectly normal. Branded asked whether or not it happened every time lightning struck. Thatcher confirmed it was indeed so. Another hors d'oeuvre later, lighting struck again. When the light turned on, Poof was laying on the ground with a knife in his chest. Blood started seeping around him. Mint started screaming. Tom felt faint. Thatcher actually fainted. Then so did Margherita. Detective Melody set up a quarantine. ooOOoo "That's it?" Detective Melody asked after Tom and Mint stopped talking. They pondered for a bit before nodding. She looked at Detective Scratch who shrugged in return. "Okay, you may go." "Thank you." Mint was the first one up and was quickly followed by Tom. The two left together, leaning on each other. A heavy sigh behind them as well as a heavy thud.